YOU'VE GOTTA FIGHT, FOR YOUR RIGHT, TO PARTTTY

today was a good day.

but i'm tired.

i swear, sleeping on the bus never felt so good.

i really fell into deep sleep.

havent had that in a few days.

im hungry.

i was too excited just now.

food and excitement is inversely proportional to each other.

you must have one and not the other.

cos you dont feel like it.

but well.

funnnnnnn.

one more week till term one ends.

thats freaking ass fast.

that sucks.

my life slips fast.

i better make good use of time.

1. econs commentary

2. EE

3. math test

4. world fucking lit

5. music presentation

6. physics pracs

7. TOK presentation

that's gonna be my next week,

then, off to OBS. :D

10 things to 10 people

1. i didn't think you'd stoop to that level. but you know what? i'll be the bigger and the better person. your leveling is rather degrading. i won't stoop to that. well, thanks for teaching me how to never underestimate people. but you know what? i'm gonna get stronger now. you'll watch me. i'm not gonna be affected by your selfish schemes anymore. i'm gonna pick myself up again.

2. i really don't understand what's going on. but i really don't know whats going on in your head. but then again, it's not like anyone knows whats going on in your head. i would appreciate it very much if you would share it.

3. thanks for being there for me whenever i need you to be there. you're one of the only people i trust and you're an awesome friend. i'm sorry i neglected you for awhile because of certain reasons. i'm glad i still have you. :)

4. thanks for being there. you're cute.

5. i wish we could spend more time together but your calls are more than enough to keep me going. and i really appreciate that. you're the best person i'll ever have and i miss you. thanks for all the advise. even though i'm really stupid and i don't listen sometimes, but hey, i need to learn it the hard way. but anyway, i'll see you soon and i miss you so so so much! thanks for being there for me ALL THE TIME. i know i can count on your for ANYTHING. I LOVE YOU!

6. thanks for being such a jerk, you're the biggest asshole i know. thanks for stooping to that level too. now i realise how much of a person you are. you taught me a lot. thank you for that. now i understand what it means to loose yourself for love. i hope she's allergic to your kisses. and you're a liar. thanks for being all that.

7. you're the most special friend i have. thanks for being there for me all the time and thanks for all the stuff you gave me. i REALLY REALLY appreciate that. you're awesome and funny and everything and i love you for that! :D

8. i love you even though you're stupid and funny at the same time. thanks for cheering me up and all. i really appreciate that. you're the besttttt!

9. i miss hanging out with you so much! you retard! and i know you'd never read this.

10. you're the dumbest person i know. i dont know how u passed the last test. but thanks for being there too! all the time, everytime. and thanks for entertaining me whenever i'm bored. physics would never be the same without you! you're the biggest retard everrrr! :D

whirlwind

the temporary is a gust of wind,

now there's a whirlwind coming along.

i'm draged by my feet.

it's in the air.

my nose touches the floor,

i'm lifted up.

spinning round and round in circles.

no, i can't hang on.

pieces of metal scratches my legs,

again and again.

splinters of wood is out of the floor.

it stabs me,

harder and harder each time.

'when is this going to end?'

forks.

they fly through the air like darts.

i dodge but now,

it hits my arms and pierces it like bullets.

everything is flying around.

its a blur.

i can't stand on my feet.

i'm flying,

around to nowhere.

no one's gonna save me now.

this is stupid

this is what you're in for when it's the IB

1. english

- prepare for IOC

- read dubliners

2. math

-prepare for test

=do more differentiations

3. music

- start on ee (not the introduction, the actual analysis)

-reasearch for MI

- actually understand musical stuff like that the form is or whats a concert overture.

- read up on musician's lives, and they're styles.

-actually practise the piano.

4. physics

-PRACTICALS!

5. econs

-read up before going to class.

-revise last year stuff like micro and macro.

i'm happier than you'd ever think i'd be

i don't need you anymore.

i don't love you anymore.

i don't want you anymore.

you're not someone for me.

i have found peace with myself.

and i shall move on.

and i am.

dont worry about me.

i have found the temporary happiness,

that keeps me going.

temporary.

hmmm.

i'm much happier now.

cos you make me happy.

:D

and i can eat again.

double :D

:D

i think i've found something to live for,

for now.

cos it feels like tonight

IF you were in my life,

maybe i'll be happier.

maybe i'm already happy.

i just don't know it yet.

MAYBE you could make me happy.

maybe you can't make me happy.

maybe i'm already happy.

i have yet to realise it.

EVEN IF you were here,

you can't make me happy.

even if you weren't here,

i would not be happy.

I DON'T THINK

i'll ever be happy

with or without you.

cos i'm gonna be like this you know,

miserable and old.

because this describes totally how i feel now

SometimesItrynottohatemyselfForeverythingIneversaidWhenyouwerehereAndsoI'mburningup

photographsOfwhatwasaperfectpast'CauseI'mstillhereButI'mbarelyholdingonWheredidIgowrong

ChokingonthedifferenceBetweenmeandtheworldAndeversinceyou'vebeengoneI'vebeentornapart

Iknowthatyoucan'thearmebutI'mstillhurtAndIwishyouwerehereIt'ssohardthatItrytoburyit

Pretendthatyoudidn'texistSoIcanbestrongButIfeelsickAndIfeeldiseased'Causeeveryoneabandons

meAndIcan'tmovealong'CauseI'mbarelyholdingonWheredidIgowrongChokingonthedifference

BetweenmeandtheworldAndeversinceyou'vebeengoneI'vebeentornapartIknowthatyoucan'thear

mebutI'mstillhurtAndIwishyouwerehereIcannotpretendyoudidn'texistMiseryisjustastateofmind

Hidingfromtheworld'snowaytoliveSoI'llconvincemyselfthatI'llbefineI'llbefineButsinceIlostyou

I'mbarelyholdingonWheredidIgowrongChokingonthedifferencebetweenMeandtheworld

Andeversinceyou'vebeengoneI'vebeentornapartIknowthatyoucan'thearmebutI'mstillhurt

SoIlookuptothestarsAndwonderoutloud

WhyeverythingIhadinlifeHasfallenfrommyarms

CanyouevenhearthissongI'mscreamingatthecloudsScreamingtoagalaxyThatnevercaredatallThat

I need you here

where did i go wrong?

it happens.

we do useless things which never mean anything.

i'm so tired.

and i don't feel like doing anything.

i don't think i did anything since last saturday.

i need to go to the esplanade

and i need contact lenses.

i feel like reading for the rest of the day.

i practised the violin today.

it was alright.

i watched american idol and csi today.

i wanna draw.

but i suck at it.

and i wont draw when i suck at it.

school tmr.

i need a holiday.

im so tired.

:(

music is the only thing that i wana listen to now.

please don't talk to me.

i'm tired of listening to people talk.

i like being alone.

i'm lonely, i'm scared

i swear, in the 17 years of my life.

i never celebrated valentine's with the special boy crap.

but well.

my life isnt that sad.

hahaha.

i got flowers today. :D

lol.

i hate this kinda days.

cos its really stupid.

makes you feel so lonely.

and then the ib comes along and tells you you're not alone.

technically,

i still am.

stupid day.

i swear.

at this moment,

i dont want to ever give my heart to anyone ever again.

cos you know what happens.

nothing lasts forever.

today,

i watched the curious case of benjamin button.

its so sad and i really wana watch it again.

cos its good.

you learn stuff from the movie.

like how letting go is so important.

and how nothing lasts forever.

how we have to lose to know how important that thing is.

and how to have the courage to live all over again.

like what i need to do now.

start over.

i guess when you look over at other people's life.

you wished at some point,

you could be like that.

only to realise that you already had a moment like that.

but it's over.

you're never gonna get it back.

or,

find out things you never knew.

honestly,

i think i should hang out with old people.

cos they're the wisest and that's the only way you're gonna learn anything.

learning things from friends dont really get you anywhere,

unless they're well-read,

cos the only way people learn something useful.

cos in school, we learn nothing.

with that to be said,

im still stupidly bored now.

i prefer being out laughing at boys carrying flowers.

cos i think it's damn funny.

sweet but funny.

the funny part still stands out.

i'm not a robot

These are my friends

This is who they have been for always

These are my days

This is how they stay

Hey, hey

These are my friends,

this is who they'll remain forever

This is how we stay

This is going to be my support system,

and gonna keep me going through this.

it's times like this you know who are there for you.

and i'm so lucky to have them.

and i on the other hand,

would stop feeling stupid and sorry for myself.

i'll make a self relization everyday when i wake that i am better than this.

i'm gonna live through this.

i will survive.

with help of course.

time is a fucked up thing

no. if i were smiling,

i'd be a happier person.

cos then, i'd be happy.

and not crying.

or stoning.

like i am now.

what is worst than teaching a primary one kid who cant read?

waiting for someone to return love.

or time for turning back.

so i wont get my heart freaking broken, again.

no. yes.

i'm stupid for repeating it again.

but i thought it was for real.

i thought this is it.

but no.

nothing lasts forever.

nothing i want lasts forever. but i wish it did.

its times like this where you feel lost,

you realise what you are.

i am going to be better than i am right now, real soon.

i need to.

i don't want to.

if i wanted to,

i wouldnt change anything.

get stuck in a hole,

or fall and never walk again.

but i'm better than that.

i'm stronger than you think i am.

i'm going to do something great one day.

and i believe that.

no one's gonna tell me i'm not good enough.

no one's gonna tell me i'm not smart enough.

no one's gonna tell me i'm not cool enough.

no one's gonna tell me i'm not pretty enough.

no one's gonna tell me i'm not talented enough.

cos i know i am all of those.

i'd make history one day.

and you would watch my every move.

Hope

I CAN LIVE THROUGH THIS.

I WILL SURVIVE.

I AM ON MY OWN.

I AM STRONGER THAN ANY OF THIS.

screw you

fuck you.

fuck everything.

i need a fucking rebound.

and im fucking deaf in my left ear.

fuck you.