i love not

i have been talking to ken more, recently.

i really like the conversations we have.

it's deep and all.

it is so contrasting,

cos everything in school is so much more of..

well, crap conversations, it's not that it's bad and all but talking nonsense all day is somehow, i dont know, not intellectual?

i'm so shitty sometimes,

like a talk a hell load of shit that i need someone to remind me why im in this school and how i need to work, and keep me on track and all.

comparing school now and school for the last 4 years,

i think im really having english lessons now.

like serious english lessons that i never had for the last 2 years.

i actually wrote a poem in class today.

and im happy i did even though i didnt really have inspiration.

i like english lessons though i dread going for them.

im actually doing my work now,

which is a really good thing.

i never really did any work for the past 6 years of my life.

i never really cared for school, but i really do now.

i think its because of the money my parents pay,

or i dont think i''ll be studying.

anyways, my week has two days left.

cos there's tmr,

which ends at 11 cos i have to play at some school.

and saturday which ends at godknowwhattime.

a week for me is the days where u have school.

means 6 days.

sunday's going to be awesome cos i get to sleep in.

and i really need that.

i've been doing work till really late these days.

i need to start reading again.

i feel like im deprived of that really.

and i dont plan my time well enough so i dont read.

a shitty excuse huh?

oh. at pe today,

i was looking at my friend,

and i thought of bel.

FUCK!

BELINDA KHOO!!

I FUCKING MISS YOU LIKE HELL.

if you are reading this that is.

i felt like crying.

i miss you so damn much.

i have a hell load of things i need to tell you.

oh man.

this sucks.

i used to talk to u like every freaking day no matter what.

and i would know where u are and what u are doing at that point of time or something.

but now i dont.

and it's really wierd.

i have survived less than a month without talking to you.

and im typing out this out sounding like some stalker.

but i do fucking miss you.

it's sad really.

we NEED to catch up on EVERYTHING.

anyways,

i need to study for my physics now.

i suck at physics so.. yeah.

time for food.